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its hard to come to terms with… i may not see him for the next one and a half years… i don’t know where he’ll be… where i’ll be… where he’ll be… where we’ll be… its tough – this love, it is tough… we refer to our situation as a test from God… in which we must excel… we must not falter… we must not give up on each other, on our love…
but dear God, why do you not see the tears in my eyes? the sleepless nights i’ve spent crying in regret… regret for the single decision that could have affected my life… why didn’t i trust him enough then? why didn’t i believe in our love then?
i think i must be punished… punished for not valuing him enough… i don’t know God… i don’t know if you consider my love worthy to make him mine one day…

All I Ask For

Life brings you to your knees,
You cry and reach out to me,
I run to you and lift you up,
And then you walk ahead without,
As much as a glance at me.

At length you realize your mistake,
You apologize and call out to me,
You think you can reverse it all,
But you don’t realize you’re so far,
Your voice can barely reach me.

Across the moor, I see you weep,
Your tears hurt the soul within me,
But you can’t see I’m crying too,
You’re blind to the fact that I,
Need you as much as you need me.

Love is not a one-way street,
You’ve to give what you take from me,
It’s not tough once you start trying,
When I lift you up from your knees,
Don’t walk away; be with me.

unenthu

i don’t want to stand for mess secy anymore. i don’t even want to win. i’m so so sleepy and i’m very doubtful that i’ll even get one vote. i don’t care. i’m not this politics type person. i don’t dare to take risks. i do not like to take responsibility. i’m the biggest kind of loser that even walked this planet. i wonder what made me contest for mess secy. i’m in half a mind to give up right now – i’m so infinitely sleepy.
acads this week have taken a back seat. haven’t revised a single lecture. haven’t read up any notes.
the only good thing that happened this week is that my chem prof seems to like me a lot and i’m glad about that. i want to sleep! no more of talking to people and convincing them why i’ll be good because i know i won’t.